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That’s right. I wish you weren’t there- right smack dab in the middle of the picture, your ugly mug  smiling at me  blocking all the neat stuff beyond. Your nose is blown all out of proportion, your cheeks look like you just ate two squirrels and your head looks like a pimple that should have been lanced long ago. There I said it. I hate, hate, hate ‘selfies.’

Yes, this is a rant, a much overdue rant, a rant on the nauseating and growing frequency of ‘selfies.’ Can you go anywhere and not see five, ten, a hundred people taking a picture of themselves? NO!!! Here’s an idea, go buy a mirror and just hold it up when you must and stare away. I get it, you think you are wonderful. You think that including yourself in the picture will enhance the photo, make it special. Well, you are wrong, very, very wrong. It just makes it annoying, very, very annoying.

I get the idea of taking a picture with your friends or family. I used to call these ‘run-arounds’ because we all used the self-timer button, tripped the shutter and then ran around to get into the photo before the shutter opened. Fine, take a ‘selfie’ of yourself and others. But please God, I’m begging you, don’t take a ‘selfie’ to show me where you were. It’s idiotic!!

You don’t need to put yourself in the photo to show us you were there. Know why? Because you took the picture! Brilliant! Even I can figure out that since you took the picture you must’ve been there. This isn’t rocket science. It’s rampant self-involvement, narcissism run amuck. Get out of the way! Get out of the picture! Leave!!!!

Here’s an idea. Take a regular photo and then whip out a mirror and stare at yourself. Take all the time you need…you are pretty darn wonderful. Then, if you can bear it, slide the mirror away and take another picture. Aren’t you clever! Now, quick, get that mirror out, you deserve an admiring stare.

Kim Kardashian,  recently wrote: “…maybe too many bikini selfies for some people but it is what I want.” And doesn’t that say it all? Mirror, mirror on the wall who is the fairest of them all? Now, quick, take my picture!