The New 50!

Posted by on Feb 4, 2016 in Articles | 2 Comments

Strap in and buckle up, it’s going to get bumpy!

For the last few years it has become popular to say when someone is celebrating a significant birthday that “50 is the new 40” or “60 is the new 50.” Have  you ever noticed who was saying this nonsense? It is not 60 or 70 year-olds. They know that there is nothing 50ish about being 60 or 60ish about being 70. The creaks and groans of age are not ringing younger, they are reminders of every hour of every day spent walking this green Earth.  This I know.

The people that are spilling this bilge are the 30 and 40 year-olds who are saying it as a prayer that it might be true when they become senior of age. A 40 year-old knows that 50 is closely stalking. Perhaps if they say it out loud and often enough they can add an extra decade on to their precious 4th decade and be in their 40’s for 20 wonderful years instead of ten. Then they could be in their 50’s for 20 more years and never actually be 60! With any luck they will all be dead at 80.

As someone who has spent 11 months in his 6th decade I know that being 60 is pretty much like being 60. In a month I am quite certain that I will feel 61 not ten years younger. It is just the way things are and no amount of self-delusional pseudopsychbabble will ever change that. You are what you are. Your mind is playdough ready to believe anything but your body can’t be fooled. It knows.  So pay attention, listen to your body and hope for the best. And while you’re at it, live with it.

Then again……..I was just reading that Vermont is about to legalize marijuana. So on my next birthday, with the help of a certain magic brownie I could feel like a teenager again!

God help us all.

2 Comments

  1. brenda
    February 4, 2016

    No, you won’t feel “like a teenager again”. You, my friend, will feel like a stoned geezer and be asleep by 6pm instead of 8pm. Welcome to reality! From 55 in WA where we do love our brownies. I would like some of whatever Bernie is smoking – that guy has energy to spare…..putting us all to shame.

    Reply
    • David
      February 7, 2016

      I’d argue with you but I need a nap

      Reply

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